Red boxing glove denoting discord



These two are opposites (no preferences in common). It takes two incredibly mature people who respect each other's differences and are willing to grow as individuals to make this work. 

Historically, marriage counselors will see opposites marry and divorce and interestingly find the same opposite types to marry again (and usually divorce - again).  

There's always a yearning to "complete" one's self with an opposite type, but it doesn't do so without a long series of painful reckonings. Intimate relationships need some common grounds for expression.

Have your crushes on each other, (and you will have them), but we suggest that you don't take it any further unless Birth Order or Astrological Harmony (DuplyDynes) indicates otherwise.

love birds and hearts floating above them

Positives of an ISTJ-ENFP Relationship:

Balance of Logic and Emotion: ISTJs bring objectivity and rationality while ENFPs provide warmth, compassion, and enthusiasm.

Complementary Strengths: ISTJs are organized, responsible planners while ENFPs are imaginative, energetic idea generators. Together they make a well-rounded team.

Shared Judging Preference: Both prefer structure, closure and planning in their lives which provides some common ground.

stormy clouds

Challenges of an ISTJ-ENFP Relationship:

Communication Differences: ISTJs are factual and concise while ENFPs want to discuss emotions, values, and abstract ideas.

Social Orientation: ENFPs thrive on social interaction while ISTJs prefer small groups and plenty of solitary time.

Opposite Approach to Life: ISTJs prefer tradition, predictability and proven methods while ENFPs want novelty, surprises, and unexplored possibilities.

Checklist graphic

ISTJ and ENFP partners should discuss their differences openly and focus on understanding each other's perspectives if they want the relationship to succeed. But if they put in this effort, they can have a relationship that combines stability with excitement.

photo of Betty Baker

Betty Baker M.A. Psych, M.Ed

About the Author

Betty Baker is an awarded marriage and family therapist and contributor to the internationally renowned PeaceBuilders® Program - a science-based, research-validated violence prevention curriculum and professional development program for children, grades pre-K to 12.